I have also seen some of the brightest sink in the fathomless sea of unbridled passions and unruly impulses. This is where most of us and our schools fail; preparing and equipping the children with emotional skills which will help them sail through in the face of life’s vicissitudes, skills which their paper diplomas can’t help. Academic intelligence has little to do with emotional life. A high IQ is no guarantee of prosperity, prestige or happiness in life. Some people with high IQ can be stunningly poor pilots of their private lives.

Much evidence testifies that people who are emotionally adept-who know and manage their own feelings- are at an advantage in any domain of life; whether romance and intimate relationships or picking up the unspoken rules that govern success in social life. It is an observable phenomenon that people with well-developed emotional skills are also more likely to be content and effective in their lives.

Nursing schools do not only teach the physical, biological and other life sciences ,it also hones our emotions so that they remain masked and invisible ; so that we don’t buckle under the intensity of stress and emotional see-saw we deal in situations where we see patients very ill and passed on at times. It is phenomenal that the emotional maturity displayed by the nurse and all those responsible for patient care becomes a magical ingredient which to an extraordinary extent dictates the patient’s mental attitude and disposition toward his recovery.

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I do not agree. I can’t believe Muslim religious organizations could could call for such actions. It sounds hollow. It doesn’t make sense. Religion per se is all for the good of us all. It inculcates in our stubborn and proud minds the path towards the truth, towards a glorious end, to be the ‘humane’ beings we were created to be.

Eid-ul-Azha ,commonly known as the Hajj, is a day of sacrifice. It is one of the five pillars of Islam, the foremost being the Kalima ( declaration),Fasting during the holy month of Ramadan, Namaaz or prayers and Charity. Hajj is celebrated to commemorate the days when Ibrahim willingly offered his son, Ismael to Allah as a sacrifice.That was in Mecca, in Saudi Arabia. Since then , there has been a multitude of muslims all over the world who joined the pilgrimage to commemorate this day and multitudes more to do so. There are no kings, no masters, no servants.ONLY ALLAH.Everyone stands equal before HIM. Every man wears the same piece of garment and the women wear long dresses as the custom.And there is no segregation of men and women. This is the beauty and the significance, if I may be allowed to express, of this pilgrimage

Islam as all religions does not teach hatred. It does not teach violence. It inculcates love.It inculcates respect for all things created.And respect for human rights.The lesson learned from this very beautiful pilgrimage is very simply stated, the triumph of Good over Evil. What more can be a better platform to spread this message than this day?

And here we are, in this world of wide hypocrisy. Politics and Power has become the names of the games enacted by stage actors. We give credit and acknowledge that most governments of the world exist for the betterment of their citizens. However, it can’t also be denied that there are few who enact these games for the sole purpose of self-aggrandisement to the detriment of the lives of the people who chose them to serve for the better.

Politics and Power rule the world. Mostly for the good but the little that is left is catastrophic. That is where real deep-seated politics and power lie. Others may contend that religion is power by itself. It is. If used to its full ideals. But in this game of games,the very essence and ideals of religion itself is not spared. At what cost? Violence. Hatred. Death.War.And the very expensive violations of human rights. Religion is being used as a power to destroy.

Where hatred and discontent abound, Religion is a very powerful tool not to divide but to unite all people. Let religion be a vehicle to incite PEACE .It’s a solution to peace and a solution to live the decent lives we all deserve to live. The ‘ right’ message of religion should not be diminished. Its message has to be spread speedily.It is the moral obligation of every rationale human being to do so. It is the moral obligation of every ‘true’ religious organization.

What do we hope to gain in the end? Every single one of us is destined to move on to the next world ( if you believe in the Hereafter),for better or for worse,where life is immortal, where blessings are everlasting. Some may disagree and say ” You live in an illusionary world, in the ages past”in the context that ours is a world where everyone has the fundamental right to make one’s choice and live by the choice one makes. But I would still say,there is no time. Or is there? Today, we probably have time enough.Take a chance.The choice is yours.

Help make human rights a reality for everyone. Give peace a chance.

On the occasion of the 60th Anniversary of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, 10 December 2008.

NurseCorner.Com is a member of Amnesty International and an NGO recognized by the International Human Rights Association, India (IHRA)

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She was one of the many young nurses who worked with me in India. Tall, pretty with her bright, rounded eyes and curly hair. What was striking with Vinitha was her ever smiling face. Now- I like my nurses smiling. Smiles thus whilst away our pains and sorrows. Smiles are comforting to one’s soul.

She was a dedicated, efficient nurse and to further her career, I assigned her to manage the female general ward which housed the medical and surgical cases and the female burn’s unit.

Now this was no mean feat but she pulled it off with her usual confidence and managerial skills.

Her patients and their families loved her. Doctors loved her. Her colleagues respected her.

I believed her.

It used to be my routine to visit the critical cases first. The patients of course wouldn’t be able to recognize this but I visit the family to offer my counsel and consolation if necessary. Besides, there were the nurses who were bound to be more stressed out and who really needed all the encouragement to carry on with the challenges before them.

Vinitha used to call me ‘Helen Ma’am’. The only one to do so. On Sundays, she relieved me from my administrative duties and she did so happily and intelligently.

There were times when she used to come to me with tears expressing her hurt over this and that. I particularly remember how she patiently and lovingly brought a burn patient out from the brink of death. Everyday, she used to give me an update of her patient’s condition and whenever I visited her ward, she accompanied me to this particular case to have a look at the progress. I was pleased with the team’s work. I was proud of these young nurses who so early in their life had to care and face such painful situations of humankind. Not that burns is uncommon in India. It is very common till this day. Bride burning, dowry harassment and the like.

In India, an arranged marriage is a practice that to this day is very much in vogue. Love marriages do happen these days. Even live-ins. But a good percentage of love marriages and live-ins do not work and hence, do not last. They fail because marriages without parental consent are doomed to fail for the couples can’t and won’t expect parental support. And of course, there is the caste system to consider. This is my observation as I do an anthropological study of this society which seems to appear too complex for the outsiders.

At one time, Vinitha had gone for a month’s leave. It was for her wedding to a guy chosen by her parents for her. But not before showing me the pictures of the probable mates.

She was glowing in her sari when she came back and introduced me to her husband. I remember telling him to take care of her well before she went showing off her husband to everyone in the hospital. Happy, happy Vinitha.

Vinitha is dead now. The girl who so tenderly nurtured her burn patients back to life ironically died of severe burns inflicted on her by herself. Her marriage did not turn out to be a fairytale. Arranged marriages do fail after all.

She crossed my thoughts today as I was coming to work. I breathe a prayer for her soul that she may find her everlasting peace and happiness and be enveloped in love by the angels. She was my professional colleague but most of all, she was my friend and for this alone, I am thankful.  

Your Helen Ma’am honors you, Vinitha

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The hospital building , all of 16 foors, was in its last stages of construction and in preparation for its grand opening to the Bangladeshi public and others alike, we were then in full swing recruiting the staff for all services.And what a recruitment it was! We wanted to recruit localy-trained nurses …there’s nothing like a culturally compatible staff …that was the ballgame. To our great disappointment, we found that a few really met the quality that we were looking for in a nurse. As we studied the barriers to quality nursing, we found that the written English language( which is ?universally adapted in medical care settings and the educational preparation for a course as tough as nursing were lacking. What was not lacking was the hunger for knowledge and the enthusiasm to perform as good as their counterparts in other parts of the world.We took up the challenge and developed a very comprehensive training program to match that hunger and enthusiasm. And boy! weren’t we pleased with the efforts. For at the end of a long training, they have proven indeed that they be as good as any nurse can be. Their English conversation became their second language, and their nursing and communication skills had tremendously improved.

The hospital is now in full swing, and the nurses , barring a very few, stayed behind serving their people as they should with pride and honor .

I am pleased. I am very pleased of their accomplishments . I am pleased that I was, in small way, a part of those accomplishments.

To those nurses…I salute you all!!

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Dear Nurse,

You washed me. You fed me. You clothe me. You helped me walk. You made me sit. You talked to me like I am one of your own. You were my listening ear, my shoulder to cry on. You haven’t turned away at the color of my skin. You haven’t condemned me for my faith. You made me smile. You made me laugh, making me forget my pains while I am alone. Old and alone. When my own flesh and blood had deserted me,  you, my kind, gentle and loving nurse held me, cared for me that I may live to see another day.

Thank you. I noticed that you love flowers. You call them poesy. This poesy…these orchids are for you.

A well-wisher

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